Oh I'll blow out those candles all right!
So I am now officially (grunt) 29 years old. I have lived for 29 years. (Heavy sigh) This is not something I want to be celebrating.
It isn't turning 29 that bothers me. 29 is not an unlucky number historically. As far as I know, it is not used as a pinnacle number in any cult rituals. It has no biblical significance. The number it self is unnoticeable. So my issue is not with 29.
My issue is with the fact that it falls just before 30. So the way I see it, I am turning 30 for an entire year. Everyday for the next year I am turning 30. That sucks. I would rather just turn 30 and get it over with. Like tearing off a band-aide. Rip. Done. It may hurt a little, but it is done.
But noooooooo. Instead, I get to remove the extra strength surgical tape one micro-fiber at a time! Don't just hit me with a bus, back it up and do it over and over again, just incase I didn't feel it the first time!
The real @&%#$ is that I still feel like a clueless kid fumbling my way through the world. Taking shots in the dark. But I am the grown up. I have a child who actually believes I know what I am doing. Poor delusional boy. Someday he will realize there is no Santa, Easter Bunny, Tooth Fairy, and mommy is a fraud! She is thirty-something (that is now officially a cuss word!) and completely void of any useable wisdom.
My friends think I should enjoy my last year of twenty-something (not a cuss word, but the official title of the enemy made up of cute blondes with perky breasts, personal trainers, and J-Lo asses, between the ages of 21 and 28.) But that is like telling an inmate on death row to enjoy his last meal. I mean really. How is that possible? You see the chair down the hall, you hear it hum as it warms up, and yet, you are supposed to appreciate the taste of overcooked roast, instant potatoes, and soggy corn. MMMMMMMMM!
RIGHT!
So I will be the dutiful little birthday girl, blow out my candles and make a wish. I can't tell you what I plan to wish for, but if tomorrow all the Twenty-something's (aka the enemy) look more like Nancy Ragan than Brittney Spears, you'll know who to thank!
It isn't turning 29 that bothers me. 29 is not an unlucky number historically. As far as I know, it is not used as a pinnacle number in any cult rituals. It has no biblical significance. The number it self is unnoticeable. So my issue is not with 29.
My issue is with the fact that it falls just before 30. So the way I see it, I am turning 30 for an entire year. Everyday for the next year I am turning 30. That sucks. I would rather just turn 30 and get it over with. Like tearing off a band-aide. Rip. Done. It may hurt a little, but it is done.
But noooooooo. Instead, I get to remove the extra strength surgical tape one micro-fiber at a time! Don't just hit me with a bus, back it up and do it over and over again, just incase I didn't feel it the first time!
The real @&%#$ is that I still feel like a clueless kid fumbling my way through the world. Taking shots in the dark. But I am the grown up. I have a child who actually believes I know what I am doing. Poor delusional boy. Someday he will realize there is no Santa, Easter Bunny, Tooth Fairy, and mommy is a fraud! She is thirty-something (that is now officially a cuss word!) and completely void of any useable wisdom.
My friends think I should enjoy my last year of twenty-something (not a cuss word, but the official title of the enemy made up of cute blondes with perky breasts, personal trainers, and J-Lo asses, between the ages of 21 and 28.) But that is like telling an inmate on death row to enjoy his last meal. I mean really. How is that possible? You see the chair down the hall, you hear it hum as it warms up, and yet, you are supposed to appreciate the taste of overcooked roast, instant potatoes, and soggy corn. MMMMMMMMM!
RIGHT!
So I will be the dutiful little birthday girl, blow out my candles and make a wish. I can't tell you what I plan to wish for, but if tomorrow all the Twenty-something's (aka the enemy) look more like Nancy Ragan than Brittney Spears, you'll know who to thank!
posted by Cindy at 12:39 AM
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